Review: Scarecrows (2019)

A father and son living on a remote farm kidnap unsuspecting teens, and tortuously transform them into disgusting corpse-scarecrows to let them die on their corn field. Two young couples on a road trip together that promises lots of sex and weed smoking become stranded nearby and try to escape this terrifying fate.

Directed by Stu Stone, with a script co-written by himself and Adam Rodness, Scarecrows will satisfy the torture porn crowd, with extended scenes of individuals tied up while they undergo psychological torment and extreme physical discomfort and pain.  There isn’t a lot of blood, but these scenes will still make you squirm.  Be ready for quite a bit of unsettling shrieking and yelling in this movie.

Of course, leading up to the eventual horror, the audience is introduced to the four teens in the movie: Good girl Ash (Hannah Gordon), goodish boy Ely (Umed Amin), slutty girl Devon (Maaor Ziv), and frat boy Farbsie (Mike Taylor), who will all eventually encounter the hillbilly killers later in the movie. These moments don’t build any sympathy for the characters, and in fact, I was just waiting for someone to put a god damn scythe though all their heads.  I did not find one redeeming character in the entire movie.  I wanted to side with the killer, but these killers are no Jason Voorhees or Freddy Kreuger- no charisma.  I would have had a better time watching this movie if it had more slasher aspects to it other than dislikable teens acting like idiots.

A scene that stood out for me is a scene where the group stops at a stream to go skinny dipping.  When the guy gets naked, it’s a joke and he is barely shown, but when the girl’s get naked, the movie stops. They take off their clothes in slow motion, and a song plays as if time stops.  This scene left me cold.  Do the filmmakers assume everyone who is watching doesn’t want to look at men’s bodies?  Rude. It’s 2019, don’t they know that gay men and straight women watch movies nowadays, too? Fine, if a filmmaker wants to show girls, but throw us a bone, too, huh?

All in all, watch this one if you want to see hillbillies torture a group of insufferable idiots.

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